“Joy is just energy”
I doubled the fun this week with two guests on Coaches Go Social!
If you didn’t already know, May is Mental Health Awareness month. So I wanted to bring guests on the show to share their expertise in how to navigate these difficult times.
My two amazing guests this week are going to talk about bringing mirco-dose moments of joy to your life.
Aditi Ramchandani is a life coach and an emotional wellness speaker. She helps working professionals transform their stress by using self-care practices. She’s found that self-care really does make a difference.
Janet Fouts calls herself a human potential facilitator. She helps people realize who they really want to be. She works with executives as well as coaching one on one. It’s really about how to help her clients be the best person they can be. Sometimes that is a deep journey of discovery. She is also a speaker and an author. She has a new book coming out this summer called Microdosed Mindfulness.
Janet really likes to think about how we can take better care of ourselves and be our true selves in these little micro-moments. People think that mindfulness is something that takes all day. That’s not the case. We can just be mindful!
So how can we use micro-dose mindful moments to spark joy?
After Aditi’s cousin tragically passed away on her birthday last year, she really started to question everything. She started asking herself big questions: “What am I even doing with my life? What am I chasing? What is the point of all of this if we never even get there?”
Her cousin was studying to become a meditation teacher. He was leaving America to go to India to pursue this full time. He literally passed away weeks before he was supposed to get on that plane. It really made Aditi think about these goals we have for the future. The things we want to reach for in 3 or 4 years. But what if we never get there? What about everything we just missed?
She also started thinking about what she was focusing her time on. She realized that a lot of her time was focused on being stressed. She was stressed about the future. She was stressed about the past. She was stressed about what’s not working right now.
This questioning really gave Aditi perspective. Realizing that the long term goals might not ever happen, she asked the most important question: “How can I enjoy this day? If today were to be my last day because technically we never know when it’s going to be our time, would I be happy with the day I lived?”
She drilled down deeper and asked herself, “What does make me happy? What does bring me joy?”
She started to do more of those things. And she wondered why she didn’t do more of these things before? She thought about what people might say or she thought it wasn’t a valuable activity or it’s not productive.
There is this conversation about joy where people think it’s this frivolous thing. That it doesn’t matter. But to Aditi joy really is life, and she is excited to change the conversation around joy. She feels like we spend a lot of time in other areas and not enough time in joy.
Her and Janet agree that it doesn’t take a lot of time to experience joy. It can be a 10 minute joy break during your day. People don’t always know what brings them joy. Aditi challenges readers and listeners to pay attention to what lights you up this week. How can you add more of what brings you joy into your days, especially your busiest days. That’s probably when you need it the most!
Aditi believes we waste a lot of time being stressed out. If we actually worked on releasing some of the stress and tension, we’d have a lot more free time. We spend a lot of time worrying about things we can’t change or things we can’t do anything about.
Aditi finds that doing a brain dump like writing down everything that is stressing you out and also thinking about what the possibilities are, is helpful, and then just release it. Let it go. There’s nothing more you can do about something you can’t control.
After working with Aditi’s client who owns a brick and mortar restaurant and is super busy, and figuring out how to automate her systems and delegate tasks, they discovered she was able to free up 10 hours of time to give back to herself! 10 hours!
Janet agrees that if we spend too much time on things we can’t control like spending too much time on social media or watching the news, those are things that are huge time sucks that we don’t even recognize. Mindfulness is nothing more than noticing. If we just stop and notice what’s taking up our time, especially things that are out of our control and let them go things will shift.
Janet believes making that mindshift to joy is possible. Take a moment and look around you. Look out the window. Look at the sky. Look around your office to see if there is something that reminds you of a time where you experienced joy. Sometimes people think joy is only worthwhile if it is huge.
Joy doesn’t have to be this big or amazing thing. If we are simply calm and quiet and happy with what we are doing that’s joy too. It doesn’t have to be the highest form of joy to be worthy. That’s something we forget.
That’s why these microdosed moments really help us to aggregate joy throughout our day. If we just take a moment to be present instead of seeing things as interruptions or distractions, those moments will be more helpful.
It doesn’t have to be so big. It can be as simple as a 90 second moment. It can be 12 seconds. Just take a breath. Be present and be grateful that we’re here. That’s all it has to be. Be grateful that at this moment, we are fine. And we might be fine in the next moment too.
You think about the past. You think about the future. But if you’re not in the moment, you’re just not fine Janet says.
To start being more mindful Janet says it’s really about getting into the habit of checking in with yourself. It’s noticing where your body holds tension.
Aditi adds that the clients she works with are extremely busy so she invites them to think about how they can integrate these moments into their daily lives rather than it being this extra thing they have to do. Aditi suggests setting an alarm on your phone to check in on yourself. You can pair the alarm alert with a question like, “How are you feeling right now?”
Aditi also suggests to really notice what is stressing you out during your day. What are your regular daily stressors? One of the things that Aditi does is she goes outside when she wakes up. The sun has a positive impact on you and sets you up for the rest of your day.
One daily stressor that seems pretty common is people losing their keys. So how can you shift these small stressors? Aditi suggests maybe putting your keys in the same area at night when you come home. Tackling these little small stressors that are changeable can make a big difference in increasing joy.
If you don’t know what brings you joy, Janet says it happens all day long. It happens in that first sip of coffee or tea. If you stop and savor it that’s joy! Appreciation brings joy. A client of Janet’s had to attend work meetings with a co-worker that drove her crazy. So Janet sat down with her to write down what she appreciated about this situation. She was grateful to have the job, she liked her job and this person who annoyed her actually had done some good things. Over time, Janet’s client could start to appreciate her job and even the meetings. She could appreciate the job. She learned how to come to the meeting with appreciation. It got to the point where the meeting with the annoying co-worker no longer bothered her. That’s joy!
If you are not taking time for yourself to be joyful, the first step is noticing that this is happening. You can take a moment for yourself at any time. Take a breath in between projects or meetings. Just to center yourself and be present. You can create little reminders to take better care of yourself. As you develop those habits, they get bigger and they aggregate.
If you are going from extreme to extreme that might be a sign you’re burned out. It’s important when you recognize this to take the rest that you need.
If you find yourself in the burned out space, think about your values. Are you running from place to place out of obligation? Stop to think what’s really important to you and honor that. When you think about what’s important to you, you can get back into your schedule in a way that lights you up. If you’re dreading going back to your schedule after a period of rest, there’s something you need to shift. Aditi doesn’t believe that life has to be so dreadful.
If you still are unsure of what brings you joy, Aditi is a big fan of the brain dump! Make a list of 20 things that make you happy. Then notice for the next week how you feel when you do any of those things or add new things to your list if you notice it brings you joy.
Janet says at the end of the day joy is just energy. We get to make the choice of what we give our energy to.
Stay tuned for more mental health and mindset guests on Coaches Go Social. Every Tuesday at 9:30 am PST for the rest of the month!
And if you are really considering live video in 2021, you can check out my self guided course to create your own Live Video Show https://capitalizesocialmedia.com/cwl/
Also, if you are a coach looking for a little more marketing support come join my private Facebook group, the Consistent Content Club! I also have another group that goes even deeper. If you’re interested in the new Tidepool group, set up a time to chat with me directly!
If you want to talk more about manifestation or if you just need some positivity right now, let’s set up a time to chat!